What A Week...

I can tell you right now. I will never be happier for a weekend in my life. This week has put me to hell and back. Lessons learned.

You can tell me you aren't like other guys all you want. Girls can tell me to trust them all they want. But I just have to start keeping my guard up, otherwise I'm going to be in the same boat I was in a couple days ago. In my cubicle at work crying... in my car driving crying... in my room that night crying. The probably rudest and lowest thing of my life happened to me this week, and I don't even know by who. I didn't know anyone hated me. I didn't know there was so much to not like. But I will change that.

I went through a mini depression. I wanted to move out. I got pranked twice in a night... and that was just serious someone about driving me out of Garden Court. But no, it didn't happen. There was an accidental intervention, called people I love, loving me.

I just want to have fun. 

I don't want the "you're a beautiful girl, but I am not looking for anyone right now.." talks.

Why can't for once... it just not happen like that.

I don't care if we are boyfriend and girlfriend next week... I just want a chance.

I want one guy who will give me the chance.
But I've learned not to expect a thing.
Also.

I don't want the bashing of people on who I am.

I don't want people to tell me and Kylee we're too much.

I love being crazy, weird... whatever you say that I am.

But mainly, I'm a person too... and a sensitive one at that, I feel things.


Here's the ups of the week.


Being pulled over by bike cops.
Belaying at the ropes course for a guy on the wobbly log, and ending up ON the wobbly log.

Swimming with my favorite guys ever.

Kylee Geisler, she'll never make me feel like a nobody. She'll never make me feel like I'm not worth it. And she will always make me happy. (Our shirts say: This is my best friend)

Kylee Maughan, she's married and gone. But she is always there for me.

Brianna Anderson, she's tough, smart, beautiful and she's got my freaking back.

These three are the best friends a girl could have.

My mother is the greatest. My aunt Barbi is amazing and calls me. And then I have friends who just without even knowing the details going on behind the scenes are just awesome, because.

Hikes with Shane. Double dates with Kylee. Peeing out the fire... hilarious. Working with J-Russ. Bowing with Yogi. Scottish accents. Dinner with Cody. 

Facetime with Brody and Sherman.

Playing with my sweetest little Oweny. 

He was letting his fish swim... in three different cups.

And then coming home to this:

Nathan Monson really knows how to make a girl feel good about themselves. Can't say I didn't get a lot of surprises this week. But this is the only one that made me feel good about myself and it really really did. I wanted to cry with joy of how nice a person could be, and how much a person could care to leave this for me. (The note says you much be a magnet because I'm attracted to you). He's one of the sweetest guys I know.