I got to college. I have an amazing time. I meet some jerks. I cry. I have an amazing time. Then life does a complete 360 on me. I cry. I go to my friends. I have an amazing time. Sometimes I stay in, sometimes I go out. I have incredible friends and those few close ones that make all the ups and downs smooth sailing. That's life as a college freshman.
Then I come home. I love home. I love my family. I love my best friends. Then I deal with the usual disappointments, I go to the one of two places I always went, with one best friend or with the other and his family. I'm happy. I have an amazing time. And then I remember that I'm leaving them within days.
It's hard to leave the people you love. It's move away without your best friends, especially when the goings get tough.
Life WAS easier in the lunch box days...
When you didn't have to make the big decisions.
When you didn't feel emotions as strongly.
When people didn't expect much of you.
When your pigtails were so cute,
That it was impossible to let someone down.
Well news flash, those days are over.
You do let people down.
You do have the achy longing for those simpler days.
You have money stresses.
You have future stresses.
And you come home only to leave it again.
Imagine being in love. Imagine always having some one to go to, to hold you. Imagine knowing exactly how someone is feeling by the face they're making, the mad face, the sad face, the happy face, the awkward nervous face… the different smiles and expressions. Imagine being so happy every drive home. Imagine singing, laughing, dancing… spinning round and round and dipping down to the floor, like no one else is even there. Imagine kissing in the sunshine and kissing in the pouring rain... long warm hugs. Now Imagine leaving that over and over and over again.
Then I come home. I love home. I love my family. I love my best friends. Then I deal with the usual disappointments, I go to the one of two places I always went, with one best friend or with the other and his family. I'm happy. I have an amazing time. And then I remember that I'm leaving them within days.
It's hard to leave the people you love. It's move away without your best friends, especially when the goings get tough.
Life WAS easier in the lunch box days...
When you didn't have to make the big decisions.
When you didn't feel emotions as strongly.
When people didn't expect much of you.
When your pigtails were so cute,
That it was impossible to let someone down.
 |
| Can't get mad at that face... |
You do let people down.
You do have the achy longing for those simpler days.
You have money stresses.
You have future stresses.
And you come home only to leave it again.
Imagine being in love. Imagine always having some one to go to, to hold you. Imagine knowing exactly how someone is feeling by the face they're making, the mad face, the sad face, the happy face, the awkward nervous face… the different smiles and expressions. Imagine being so happy every drive home. Imagine singing, laughing, dancing… spinning round and round and dipping down to the floor, like no one else is even there. Imagine kissing in the sunshine and kissing in the pouring rain... long warm hugs. Now Imagine leaving that over and over and over again.
And I can't go back… not now.
And now even as best friends having an amazing time together, I cry just replaying and feeling the comfort in the memories.
Imagine doing everything you know to be right, never swearing, drinking… feeling guilty even at mistakes that aren't yours. Imagine getting good grades, working, filling out scholarship after scholarship. Imagine trying your best everyday because you KNOW what you believe and you WANT to do what's right. And then imagine being doubted… being lectured and being pushed. Imagine feeling that you aren't good enough. Imagine feeling like everyone else is loved more.
I try my very best.
But nobody is perfect.
And I do what I do for me and for my Savior.
I don't do it for anyone else,
So I don't need pressure and pain from anyone else.
"I'mma keep it cool, and I'mma do me
It is what it is and that's how it's gon' be
Until I get there
And yeah I got flaws, I know I'm not perfect
But all the ups and downs, will soon be worth it
When I get there" -Lupe Fiasco
Imagine having one person in the whole world that you can tell everything to. I have guy best friends that I absolutely trust, but you just can't tell them everything. I have girl friends I trust, but I can't at the same time. There is one girl in this whole world who I can tell everything to and I won't be judged for it, I won't be lectured for it and she will always be a comfort and support to me. Then imagine only seeing her four times a year. Imagine moving three states away from her.
Life is hard. And life would be a whole lot easier if I knew exactly what I was supposed to do with it. It'd be a lot easier without heartbreak and without the pressures and expectations of everyone else for your life.
People tell me I'm doing it right.
People help me and cheer me up.
The people I know give me something to smile about.
And I cannot imagine a life without them.
They tell me I'm beautiful.
They tell me they love me.
They dance with me in the rain.
They call me at midnight to say hi.
They bring me pizza and ice cream.
They skip hot tub outings to listen to me.
They come check on me in my room.
They go to the temple, games & paaaarty with me.
They ask how I'm doing.
They sacrifice for me.
They are just fun to be around.
They make forgetting life's struggles easy.
These are the people who I love. (There are plenty more, not pictured.) These are the people I appreciate and rely on so much. They make me happy and bring me up in the sad times. I'd be lost without you. Thank you.
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