LaLaLaLaLove Life, What's That?

I've fallen in love with the idea of love... and sometimes that means I can be happy when thinking about it and sometimes my heart just grieves for it.

February fourteenth. Valentine's Day. No roses, no teddy bears, no chocolates, no kisses... Unfortunately my knight in shining armor was not hit by cupid this year (which is my own fault for never knowing what I want) and so here I am not knowing quite how to celebrate the day dedicated to love.

The dictionary describes Valentine's Day as follows: 

a day for the exchange of tokens of affection

Urban Dictionary says otherwise:

1. The reason so many people are born in November.

2. A holiday maliciously created to make lonely people extremely depressed.

3. Single's awareness day

Some people think Valentine's Day is just a day for greeting card companies to get income and for fresh flowers to be cut... for single people to look REALLY single... Valentine's Day to me is reminder day. It is a day that requires you tell the person you love that you love them. Sometimes we get caught up in work and school and we miss that... Valentine's Day isn't just about what presents to get or give... it's about making sure you recognize those people you love. 


So to all you people with Valentines today, make sure they know today and every day how much you love them. To all of you who don't have Valentines today or most years... your time will come and girls/bro nights are where it's at! To those who wish you could just go back to a simpler time when someone did love you, I feel for you.

Forget fancy flowers though, this year for Valentines Day all I want a dandelion.

So I can make a wish.

In seventh grade I got a pearl from Ben Nelson. I'm sure Joseph Klos made me origami for Valentine's Day in eighth grade, (but that was my awkward stage anyway so I didn't expect a Valentine). In ninth grade I had two: one who I liked, one who liked me. I don't even have the fifty Winnie the Pooh and Monsters Inc. bulk pack of valentines cards coming around this year with class lists... teddy bears, chocolates, flowers, homemade cards... where does the time go?

No Little Caesars runs, no warm hugs, no roses; but what hurts more than the gifts that I have no guy to hold me in his arms and tell me he loves me or appreciates me or even likes me for that matter.


I am over the depressing times of my high school heartbreak, but I will never stop wanting be loved... hearing love songs and actually relating the lyrics to myself, having someone who always wants to be with me... This day just reminds me that that's not how it is anymore. 


Ah, reality.

How Valentine's Day makes me feel:

I don't want to rush into love. So don't get me wrong, being in like is sufficient enough (although, not much of that happening either), but one day... to have that... will be the happiest days. 

When I watch love movies and think about couples, my heart aches to have a someone's shoulder to lean on and hand to hold again. I just want to touch the nearest person and try to feel a spark... then I think twice, knowing that's not how it works. It's not just any hand or any arms to be wrapped in, not the pounding of just anyone's heart... I want to feel nothing but happiness, no doubts in my mind... I want to have someone that I KNOW I have feelings for. I want someone who I'd think about during class, would put that corky smile on my face when I'm just walking down the street, who I'd have energy around on my longest days... I long to be loved, or even liked by "that guy" who would ease my burdens and keep a smile on my face.


Love is a beautiful thing.

The Holiday: "Iris, if you were a melody, I'd use only the good notes."

Across The Universe: "All you need is love."

Letters to Juiet

"Dear Claire, "What" and "If" are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life: What if? What if? What if? I don't know how your story ended but if what you felt then was true love, then it's never too late. If it was true then, why wouldn't it be true now? You need only the courage to follow your heart. I don't know what a love like Juliet's feels like - love to leave loved ones for, love to cross oceans for but I'd like to believe if I ever were to feel it, that I will have the courage to seize it. And, Claire, if you didn't, I hope one day that you will. All my love, Juliet"

Dear John: "Two weeks together, that's all it took"

Hot Rod: "Life is pain- we've gotta scape the joy from it every chance we get"

Rent The Movie: "There is no future, there is no past, thank God this moment's not the last, there's only us, there's only this, forget regret or life is yours to miss. No other road, no other way, No day, but today."

The Last Song:

"Love is fragile. And we're not always its best caretakers. We just muddle through and do the best we can. And hope this fragile thing survives against all odds."

Serendipity: "A fortunate accident"

Seven Brides for Seven Brothers: "Wait for that kiss you're certain of, and let your heart decide when you're in love"

A Walk to Remember: 

"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful."

Princess Bride: "As you wish..."

Titanic: "I'll never let go Jack, I promise."

The Notebook:

"I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough."

Twilight: "You are my life now" 

Wedding Singer: "I wanna grow old with you"

Tonight I will wait for a shooting star.

So I can make a wish.

Tonight I will watch the clock for 11:11.
So I can make a wish.

Tonight I will pretend it's my birthday & blow out candles.
So I can make a wish.


I have a Heavenly Father who has a plan for me. A plan of happiness. And I know in that plan I have someone PERFECT for me out there... It's not about the list of what I want, what he looks like, how he wears his hair, it's about how me makes me feel and how unmistakably happy I am with him. I also know that there are plenty more blind dates to go on, awkward first kisses, dances to fly solo to, wishes to make...


Oneliness: n. The state of being one or single.

Just enjoying a regular old Valentine's Day with four year old Valentine's, Mom & Grandma packages, love songs and sister dates... 

(This is not to be mistaken with a depressed blog. I know that one day my prince will come and I know that it feels good to be in love. I know that I have let go of amazing people and have confused my own self of what I really want. I also know that I am extremely happy with every day of my life just how it is now... just sometimes you have to wonder and reflect, no day like V-day for that, right?)